Lee

5 years without Lee Alexander McQueen ... one stil gasps at the weight of the loss at his own hands (his.hands.) in the wake of a crushing depression ...

fashion designer does not suffice, i believe the term does not do justice to the enormous complexity of both his clothes as well as his shows ... and anybody who think he just did clothes fails to grasp the work which still today stands so far ahead of what is being done ...

last year when i thought i was going to crumble, disintegrate and shatter into a million pieces in august i turned again to Lee's body of work (and Daphne Guinness) ...

i worked through my own layers processing the layers in his shows (the chess board show was of paramount importance) and his constant commentary on feminine power and voice ...

i connected with a version of me that grew leaps and bounds in the wake of some his shows ... i fell in love again with the body of work and i *missed* him ... again and again ... i missed his voice, his talent, his genius ... and slowly, i found myself in a new playing field as the old one did not apply anymore and i kept and keep moving forward ...

seeing recently Tim Walker's next march editorial for Vogue celebrating McQueen's work was both elating and devastating ... the clothes and their commentary still current and undeniable, the artistry unique, the materials out of the box, all the things that made me instantly love his work when i first saw it ...

and then i remembered ... 5 years ... and i saw how much i changed during the first 5 years of therapy and felt so grateful that i pulled through ... it's not always possible and not guaranteed for life. the loss of potential and stories ... the world that is forever fractured ...

recovery is an ongoing affair for life! and there is reverence and love for those who did not pull through as we know how dark and terrible the battle can be! you are missed Lee ... your art did not fall!